My cold (a draft)

 Not sure why it's common knowledge that "Nyquil," The once all powerful cold-killer, is old and weak (cough-cough) because they took out the best ingredients.

This could be a pity-party or it could research what works these days. For COLDS, not the other thing.

I told a lady I wanted cherry Nyquil, not knowing about all the other ingredients.

She never called back.

Now, I can order damn near anything from the internet, anything legal, but I wonder what RFK would take? In other words, what works in 2025?

I'll continue this later.

https://www.forbes.com/ (not helpful)

https://www.forbes.com/health/wellness/best-cough-medicine/

Still not helpful, but it looks authoritative.

Robitussin, Mucinex, Honey.

Just saying that in a sentence sounds so authoritarian and bigoted, but that was the f'ng gist of their very bombastic article!!

Diverging slightly from the text:

You get the feeling that everyone is a latent addict, and just need a little push for them to fall over the edge into the fires of perdition (hell)

So forget that shit, also forget "Honey".

I hate "Mucinex", it tries to be all green and yucky to stay in soccer moms' good graces,

And if they turned it red and cherried it,

The inquisition would burn them for heresy.

  I feel better, I do, I just have a lingering cough and excess snot.

More yucky Mucinex???

There's gotta be something better, PLEEZ

I realize that this is not earth-shaking, but I appreciate my phone withholding its own keyboard while I use the regular keyboard, because it reminds me not to microscopically hunt-peck.

I still don't know how anyone texts effectively on a phone.

Now if only I knew how to resize pictures on phones.

Double-tap and drag does nothing. Resting my finger on the little square on the border lightly, occasionally it lets me drag it.

I'll summarize, then.

Full of snot?? Mucinex.

In Church / the Library / the bus?

Robitussin.

But Wait! Can I interest you in some "delsym"? only 3-dollars an ounce.

There's also a walmart brand, 45 cents an ounce.

Makes you wonder.

This bottle should have been free.
Some sick person took a swig.
(That red print you can't really read says,
"Don't use without a seal."
WHAT seal????

If I narc the guy out I could make him lose his job, and him with that nasty cough from all the rain and the snow.

This is so bad that society thinks I should ignore it, or really bitch about it.

Ain't society great? Always there with the (Snarky) answers

My cough....hmm... It's dry unless I cough in exactly the right way to hock up a giant loogie.

So I'll say it's dry, with occasional wetness.

I don't care if I cough till the cows come home, so F U, Robitussin.
Mucinex, you taste so damn bad.... I get it, you don't wanna get pilloried by the overactive mom society who have a responsibility to lock up meds only they don't, they'd rather sue.

I can imagine it... The little brat missed lunch because he was sent home early for being a miscreant.

So he hunts cabinets for stuff to eat and finds this in the refrigerator (Is that why they're selling such tiny bottles lately?? 3oz, $3 an oz, nine dollars.)

Someone out there has a cold.

They ripped off the seal from my bottle, took a swig, and put it back.

I really hope the guy isn't dying of covid or aids.