Middle class footnotes

Dinky but it comes with grass, $1.5 million

 

Excuse me while I make another fruitless attempt to kill a bug...

O!
$5000 a month for thirty years comes to 1.8 million, so you'd have 300,000 over thirty years for (IDK, insurance, taxes and fees)

The house in the second picture is 2 million, my bad.
1.5 million ain't what it used to be.

If Liver was $6 a pound, would I care?
This house can rot, land or no land.

Move to a pissant state with micromanaging politicians or, brave blizzards and hurricanes (with overweening politicians,) log in the frozen tundra or (where in hell would I spend my 5k monthly?) Buffalo NY has an incredible amount of crime, say statistics...Just saying.
"Vermont?" "Maine"? and hope your neighbors aren't witsec cultist arsonists.

Flesh-eating lakes with killer mosquitoes.

I know they gotta sell papers but at least some of the stories must be true.

https://www.quora.com/What-area-in-the-United-States-would-be-the-best-to-move-to-if-youre-in-the-Witness-Protection-Program

I choose "Nevada" because it's too hot for most everyone but my 1.5 million dollar home would get cooled 24/7.

Desert so no pesky trees or grass to mow.
Only snakes and the occasional cougar to worry about.
Spiders.

Houses look f'n great until you kill yourself shoveling snow, mowing grass, trimming trees.
Make it have a tremendous furnace and central air. And Decent Internet (and 5G)

OK, thinking BIG during boring commercials, I need (at least) $10K monthly, 

$1.5-million real estate is so yesterday.

120K a year, the salary of an average paper-pushing assistant to some biggie politician, 

The man behind the politician
(it was a TV show, I swear,
but I can't find it)

or, maybe I win the imaginary Lottery in my head.

Plenty of Reddits about this subject, I like this referral (sort of)
The upshot being that you can't tell a slum-house from a decent one.

https://www.crackshackormansion.com/part2.html

It's so incredibly complicated that I've depressed myself thinking about it.
No one anywhere could afford the house they live in, 

and treat it like an investment they can palm off on someone else way before the balloon payments and back-taxes come due.
And where are any supermarkets?
You don't plan on living off the general store, do you?
What if you piss off the Pizza-delivery guy, are you permanently cursed?
What about the stairs???!!

Middle-of-nowhere is fine, with a decent supermarket, Average (not insane nor nosy) neighbors who wonder why the hell you just showed up one day.

Not that I've read it or anything,
but wasn't Harriet too nosy for her own good?
I can't find that reference anywhere
(But apparently the book is banned, so...)

Quiet? unassuming?
Friendly to dogs and kids?
Call the FBI!!

Read this 3x and be amaaazed:
it's OK to be NOSY but when they are nosy on YOU, that tears it.
(GEEZ!!)

Get a (what's the 2024 term, uh) live-in helper, who answers the door and the phone.
Maybe they'd go to the general store for cheese and beer.
They must be friendly and not ethnic, unless this is a biggie town and then, what was wrong with an apartment?
(The implication being, you thick-rock, that people in small towns are prejudiced)

Not too big, not tiny, without much of a repressive police force.

That leaves out most of the midwest and the south.
New England?
Sooo hoity toity.
5K minimum for house, 
5K (slightly less) for incidentals

2.5k (I'd hope) for the live-in help
OK 12.5K a month. If nothing breaks, burns down or blows away.

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Footnote, on the subject of books:
Who's that spy who buys "Catcher in the Rye"
to let you know where he's standing by?
I wonder how many books the movie indirectly sold; people imitate the crap outta movies (f'n monkeys)

Does not mention the movie (at all.)
Mentions the history of the world (HOW)
But no movie.

I never saw this movie, just zillions of people imitating that move.
Is it meaningful?

My very favorite of all time ten-second imitation is from "Mr. and Mrs Smith"
Where Angelina Jolie looks like she's about to be in a compromising position, and Brad Pitt shoots a very satisfied look to a nosy bystander on the dance floor.

https://youtu.be/_qdHYygYpPc?t=57

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$200 Billlion dollars ago (more than that but I'm no Hyperbolic propaganda-type person on a mission from God)

They had to go to the moon to collect pebbles.

Or did they think the diamonds would be laying on the sand?

Or did they think (o fucket, see the pic)

Not Green Cheese, $200B please.

Astronaut-mining, horrible jobs (you thought Alaska was bad)
And if your co-workers don't like the way you look, you could be airless in space, where no one could hear you scream (sounds familiar.)
Space factories, space mines, because in space no one can smell your smog

This random-type picture encapsulates the mood (for a month, past, now, and yet to come.) insert required topical link here:

O sure, people pretend to go places and do stuff, but they're really leeching off of the AC in their car, or in supermarkets.

OK nevermind, it's on my mind, OK? My crotchety AC won't last forever, and then what?
The End